Paternity Test Quotes (6 quotes)

“Some men do not know the father of 'their' children.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana, On Masturbation: A Satirical Essay

tags: adultery, aids, assumption, bj, blow-job, cheating, child, children, church, cunnilingus, essay, essays, fake, family, family-planning, father, fatherhood, fellatio, fidelity, health, hiv, hiv-aids, hiv-and-aids, humor, humour, infidelity, marriage, masturbate, masturbation, offspring, onanism, orgasm, orgasms, parenthood, paternity, paternity-fraud, paternity-test, pleasure, pressumption, pretense, relationships, religion, satire, self-abuse, self-love, sex, sexuality, sexy-humor, wedding

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“I had a friend who got pregnant at age 14 and wasn’t quite sure who the father was.
Her paternity test went a little something like this: “If it comes out black, its Darwin’s and if it comes out white its Ray’s.”
This is how things were done in the trailer park.”
― Kate Madison, Spilled Perfume: A Memoir

tags: memoir, paternity-test, trailer-park

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“Distinctive facial features of a parent are poor people’s paternity test.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana, N for Nigger: Aphorisms for Grown Children and Childish Grown-ups

tags: dna, dna-test, parents, paternity, paternity-test, poor, poor-people, poverty

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“Some women wish the pregnancy tests also told them who the fathers are.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana, P for Pessimism: A Collection of Funny yet Profound Aphorisms

tags: dating, marriage, mgtow, paternity, paternity-test, paternity-tests, pregnancy-test, pregnancy-tests, promiscuity, relationships

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“For not taking care of his own child, a man can, with reason, argue that he made, not the child, but love.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

tags: absent-father, absent-fathers, make-love, parenthood, paternity, paternity-test, procreation, reproduction, sex, single-parent

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“The book that he wanted was in an area that seemed barren and deserted from the rest of the library, like a friend who had been alienated for committing a social faux pas such as pronouncing French words with the English “x” and “s” sound, not the “faux pas” referring to the loser in a paternity test battle.”
― J.S. Mason, The Ghost Therapist...And Other Grand Delights

tags: clever, friendship, funny, library, paternity, paternity-test, socializing, standards, witty, wordplay

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